5 signs your neediness is why you're single

Neediness is like body or mouth odour: often the owner doesn't know he's got it, and so freely, innocently and unrelentlessly annoys the he'll outta others without knowing it or ever being told to his face that he stinks, much less helped to change. All they'll do is laugh their asses out behind his back, make caricature, avoid him and/or make mockery. It's same with neediness. Most girls'll flee and talk behind you, but may never tell you you are needy, much less advise you on becoming better. That's the way things are.

Thankfully though, you've got that one friend who will tell you you are a more cheesy, floppy and needy creep than this guy to your face.

Guess what. You can't as much as see me lying here on my bed in my new, red, cotton boxers writing the words on your screen, much less get your hands on me. So nerd, tell you what: You are a needy creep because you do these: ...

We'll, before I let you into the details of how needy you are, here's a little dose of the consequences you stand to reap if you choose to give excuses, deny and hate me after I tell you the bitter truth: you'd soon be leaving the friendzone into the enemyzone, soon even porn will make you cry and suicide may just stop seeming like a bad idea.

You are needy if: 

1. You think a girl giving you her number or attention=she likes you and is your girlfriend: Really now dude? Needy guys make this mistake every time(even I once used to.) Truth though is that this kinda thinking is one of the reasons among the legion of reasons why you quickly, easily and singlehandedly blow all your lifelines with girls. It is really neediness and a de-girlfriendrated life that leads you to this kind of desperation! Yes that's clearly what it is. So, before ascending the skies, bragging to your buddies and siblings and upgrading your fb relationship status because she as much as said "hi" or "you're cute" or liked your pic or gave you her number or replied your dm, listen to other equally likely meanings or interpretations to the above treatments. Did you know that those could mean she's going through an ego shattering experience(e.g breakup) and is flirting with you just to feel she's still got handles with someone(anyone,) she wants a favor from you, she's got a plot against you and the all time classic: she just sees you as a friend. Do you even know that girls could be this savage? Probably not. Since you really haven't been with any. Listen fella, you've got to stop seeing ladies as perfect, flawless and pure saint and goddess hybrids, dethrone them from those pedestals you place them on and start seeing them as the fellow douchebag, flawed and needy humans they are to get anywhere with them.

2. You start treating her like your partner/belonging before she shows any real interest: This follows closely after the first point even in real life. When a girl gives off any of the above hints of "attraction," last place guys start treating her like she were already committed to them in a relationship for decades: voraciously searching out and liking posts on social media and generously supplying a never dry, evergreen array of comments to each post.

Who cares that we just met yesterday? We getting married. Got that?!!

There may be no problems with these if you are already in a well defined and sure relationship. But c'mon, she's not even said she loves you, agreed to be your girlfriend,  kissed you, been to your place..., gone on a real date with you and you are already showering her with compliments, validation, validation, validation. Now ask yourself: what else is left for her to look forward to as your date or girlfriend? You already sold yourself without charge!!! So don't start talking about love, family, future together(clearly and openly showing your interest) or expect accountability from a girl who's only said "hi." That's the very embodiment of needy!

3. You double, triple, quadruple... text her: You are definitely a needy creep if you bombard a girl with various layers of text before she gets the chance to reply any because you treat "no reply" like "OMG I screwed something somewhere and I need to save my 'marriage!' I can't be single again! Never. Heaven forbid"

Go get some worthy distractions into your fun free life fella and maybe you'd understand that no reply could mean she's busy with other stuff at the moment(unlike some people,) isn't in a conducive environment to reply, has replied but it hasn't delivered or just hasn't seen it. Now think of what she'd think of you on returning to her phone and finding a low battery because of your generous supply of unread texts.

Acutely desperate guy text

Definitely not a caring, concerned partner, but an irritatingly needy weaning kid who can't last a minute in mama's absence. Have fun with that.

4. You never say goodbye and/or end the call first: Needy guys always wanna hold on till forever for fear that if they lose connection or proximity, then automatically and simultaneously, some other bad guy lurking around waiting to strike will immediately pounce on the girl like a lion on prey and carry her off and away or the girl's gonna stop liking them if they can't see or talk to them anymore. We'll, I don't know where you guys got this theory and what it's called. But it's heavily wrong. Actually, if you never give a girl time to miss you and think about any moments you may have shared, then she won't miss you or think of you. Period. Instead, you become an over frequent occurrence and no longer matter much. So don't make yourself a cheap and ubiquitous product cos that makes you lose any value you may still have in her eyes. Just chill, let some time and distance happen between you two. Let her try also to get together sometimes, start the chat and beg for more while you mischievously give her attention in lil doses equal or a lil less than the one she gives like a crack seller does his junkie customers. Then enjoy her slave for your attention.

Note: For confident girls though, especially Type 1s, you should give a lil more attention than to insecure girls because they're usually really busy and their not calling or texting first may be as a result of being busy. But they usually welcome and even relish your efforts to reach out to them often and usually return the favor and explain why they haven't been seeking you out too or apologize for being negligent. But if non of these happen when you give attention, then jam the brakes a lil bro and let her miss you and seek you. If not, walk away like this...

5. Your life sucks and you need a girlfriend to be your everthing: The first advice I usually give to aspiring charmers is this: be able to have fun alone or without girls. I was hanging out with a buddy of mine from way back. He just got back from college and was like: "Men bro. I don't know what I do wrong but I always start well with all em girls but at a point they just start bailing out and withdrawing, then as if on queue, they all just coldly breakup with me without any more explanation than 'being fed up.'"

"Fed up with what" I asked?

Only one said more than that. Adding that she wanted some space."

I knew that was coming sooner or later. I had known this guy from way back high school and he was the only classmate of mine whom I had kept in close touch with ever since. In fact we had become so close that we knew each other more than our moms did! So I knew that all this buddy of mine did for fun was usually not much. I remember him being all ecstatic and upbeat whenever he got a new girl. He would tell me all the fantastic plans he had and all the reasons why he had really won this time. The new girl will be everywhere in his posts, I'd get tons of notifications of him liking all her pictures and faithfully commenting.

And then I'd wait for it...tick tick

Shortly after, no notifications, no more likes, no more talks and plans and I know what happened. But i'd still play devil's advocate and ask: "how's Stephanie?" And he'd reply with these exact same words: "bitch's left."

His problem was that he needed a girl to spice up his life and reassure him of his worth. Therefore, he'd do everything to keep her for as long as the Eiffel tower for fear of going back to the alone zones he hates. So my advice to my friend and others like him is to embrace me time and make it fun. Seek out as many worthy distractions as you can find: hobbies, places, friends etc.

Be like him

That way, you won't be frustrated and seem needy to a girl if something starts between you two and uncertainties, suspense and downturns arise. Trust me, girls'll drive you nuts before things work out. So, you'd be needing a strong and elaborate list of alternative activities to help you thrive in case things with the girl begin to wobble.